Get ready, Taco Bell is about to unleash The Triplelupa

IRVINE, CA - DECEMBER 09: Taco Bell is continuing to innovate with tastes and flavors less familiar to other regions, while infusing familiarity and authenticity in every item. The brand has seen a record-setting year for international growth and is on track to open 100+ restaurants in 2019 alone.Photographed during the Taco Bell International Menu Tasting at Taco Bell Headquarters on December 9, 2019 in Irvine, California. (Photo by Rachel Murray/Getty Images for Taco Bell)
IRVINE, CA - DECEMBER 09: Taco Bell is continuing to innovate with tastes and flavors less familiar to other regions, while infusing familiarity and authenticity in every item. The brand has seen a record-setting year for international growth and is on track to open 100+ restaurants in 2019 alone.Photographed during the Taco Bell International Menu Tasting at Taco Bell Headquarters on December 9, 2019 in Irvine, California. (Photo by Rachel Murray/Getty Images for Taco Bell)

Prepare yourselves as Taco Bell is about to unleash its most daring menu item yet — The Triplelupa.

You need to sit down as you read this column because Taco Bell is about to unleash a menu item that is as unholy as it is a Godsend — The Triplelupa.

OK, please don’t faint, because I would love for you to get through this story before your loved ones fan the smell of tacos to revive you. The Triplelupa sounds like something that Taco Bell has been dreaming up for about a decade now, but didn’t know when was the right time to unleash it on the fast-food public. Maybe now that we’re basically knee-deep in coronavirus coverage that it’s time for us to get a nice, tasty distraction.

So, Taco Bell decided to unleash The Triplelupa, a super-sized chalupa made up of three mini-chalupas. Granted, not everyone is an ardent fan of the chalupa, and maybe having a chalupa three times its size doesn’t sound nearly appealing as, say, the Crunchwrap. However, maybe this is the time to try something new and expand your taste buds?

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If you’ve been following Taco Bell over the years, you’d come to the realization that the Chalupa is their test item, of sorts. The taco-chain has created every single concoction of the Chalupa imaginable, from the Baja Chalupa (win!) to the Toasted Cheddar Chalupa (I’d rather die in a zombie apocalypse than bite into that thing again).

We’ve even had the Double Chalupa, which was a smart idea but wasn’t released at the right time. Now, Taco Bell promoters think that releasing the Triplelupa now is, indeed the right time. Oh, and did I also mention that the Triplelupa is the first-ever tear-apart item on their nearly unchangeable menu? There is a God indeed.

The Triplelupa will be making its grand appearance at a Taco Bell near you on March 12. Happy eating, y’all!