King Charles’ Coronation will kick off on Saturday 6th May – What is something that British people love more than a nice long healthy queue, or a quite milky cup of tea? It’s, it says here, the Royal Family.
The Coronation will be held at Westminster Abbey in London and last all day as we eagerly await a crown being placed atop his Royal noggin, and broadcast globally to an audience of quite literally, loads. A nice little bonus for us UK citizens is that he’s only gone and given us the Monday afterwards off hasn’t he! I mean, I am all for a long weekend, but does Charles think we’re all going to party like it’s 1953?
Regardless how we celebrate, the UK will be almost thrust into a Royal Family vortex for the weekend and foreseeable time thereafter as news outlets and celebrities alike will look to one-up one another on just how much they “just looove” the Royal Family.
The party atmosphere vibes must’ve rubbed off on some marketing guru’s at brands HQ’s these past few months, as food & drink labels are looking to pop King Charles’ face on literally anything they can in the hope we all want that “limited edition” coffee mug with one of his ears as the handle, massive Coronation UK flag, fancy table cloth with a dog on it – you name it!
Food and drinks for King Charles’ Coronation
But we’re not here to look at table cloths (sadly), we’re here to see the weird and wonderful world of King Charles’ Coronation Special Edition Party Food Things Nobody Asked For…
Walkers (Lays) Sensations Coronation Celebration
Wanting to win the tongue-twister prize today, we have Walkers (Lays) attempt to cash in on the almost cult-like rise in popularity of their “Sensations” range.
Already arguably the UK’s favourite crisp, they’ve gone big on two limited edition flavour releases which, can I shock you, I will be purchasing first time I spot them.
We have the “spiffingly splendid” King Prawn Cocktail flavour, and the “divinely delectable” Regal Lamb & Mint.
Both are outstanding flavour choices, although Prawn Cocktail is already a Walkers release, but never in the “Sensations” range – so I am expecting punchy flavours!
They’ve gone full-posh on the naming, but I cannot blame them for that – Royal Family fans will leap at the chance to say “spiffingly” and let out a posh chuckle. Even I did it just then to practice, felt good, felt…regal of me.
McVitie’s Commemorative Biscuit Selection
I forgot to mention in my opening paragraph another absolute must in a time-capsule-showcasing-all-things-British-people-love kit… It’s a decorative biscuit tin.
My oh my, do we love a decorative biscuit tin. Love ’em. Shortbread? Tea Bags? Knitting needles and loose sewing items from the 1950’s?! Throw them in a decorative biscuit tin and house guests will “ooo” and “aaah” at the sheer luxury of it.
McVitie’s know this. The Digestive Kings know. Try not to look at the horses face as that will detract from the quite lovely biscuit tin design – horse “licking lips” aside, it’s a belter, fit for any UK household wanting normal biscuits disguised as “limited edition” because of the packaging. King Charles’ Coronation would not be complete without every grandma across the UK offering their family guests a Rich Tea.
Mark’s & Spencer’s Massive Chocolate Coin
Love a chocolate coin, love even the process of getting into a chocolate coin. Now take that joy, and make it 10x bigger. Dear lord, M&S are making it hard to keep back my real money in exchange for this chocolate money.
If you thought King Charles’ Coronation was going to be endless camera shots of jewelry you have zero clue of it’s value, you might be right. But, can Charles eat it? No – you get to count your oversized fake cash before eating it. You 1, Charles 0.
The quality of the chocolate, sure, it’ll be bang average – M&S not renowned for their chocolatier craftsmen – but I certainly want one of these coins, especially coming in at a quite reasonable £2. ($2.49….or 204 Indian Rupees, which sounds way more, but it isn’t – currency is crazy right).
Joe & Seph’s Bakewell Tart Popcorn
Joe & Seph’s, meanwhile, went off-piste.
Known for crazy popcorn concoctions they’ve delved deep into their ingredients bag to pull out raspberry jam and almost flavoured popcorn.
I can imagine wolfing down an entire serving of these sitting on a Union Jack picnic blanket being panicked by a single wasp. Pure, British!
If you haven’t tried any of the Joe & Seph’s range of popcorn, please do, but I must warn you not – I repeat, not, look at the calorie information on the reverse. Enjoy King Charles’ Coronation with some popcorn, savor it, but once you’re finished I advise you tactically forget to pop this one into your MyFitnessPal, ok.
Whitley Neill Coronation Gin
According to the folks over at Whitley Neill, this on, the Connoisseur’s Cut, is a “stone-cold classic”. Literally says that on the bottle.
Now I am not sure about you, but all I can think of is Steve Austin rocking up to Buckingham Palace wearing his leather vest, undies and knee brace and a nice regal top hat – going to room 316 (I am sure that room exists in there, it’s massive), and cracking open a “stone-cold” bottle of Whitley Neill Coronation Gin and adding a dash of tonic water and a slice of lime.
Can’t picture anything else now, truth be told.
Whatever you’re picturing (sorry), have it being accompanied with this delicious tipple. Add “Gin” to the long list of things going into that “UK things” treasure chest we’re filling up. Gin’s lovely, this’ll be lovely, it’s all very lovely from the Whitley Neill brand.
So wherever, however you celebrate King Charles’ Coronation this May, do it responsibly, do it regal, and do it whilst wearing at least 3 Union Jack flags and wolfing down some ridiculously themed food and drinks goods. Happy Coronation Charles’, my boy!