Goldfish launches Spicy Dill Pickle crackers, which really should have been called Sea Cucumbers

Goldfish has been having a wild time experimenting with flavors lately. Old Bay seasoning kicked things up a notch with a summer pool party and collabo with Bravo. I recently picked up the Frank’s Red Hot flavor at the supermarket and hoo-eee that’s some good eating. And now the spice continues with a brand new flavor: Spicy Dill Pickle.

And not to give Goldfish notes on their nomenclature or anything, but this really should have been called Sea Cucumber.

We’ll get back to that in a second – and I’m sure you’re all waiting on tenterhooks to find out how I justify that wild accusation tossed the company’s way. But first, let’s talk about the flavor.

Per a PR rep for the company, it’s exactly what you might expect… “Tangy dill pickle flavor” with a “spicy kick,” in the normal shape of the Goldfish crackers.

They also note correctly that pickles – and spicy pickles – are incredibly popular right now. From chips to nuts, everything is getting that “oops, the pickle juice seeped onto something else on my plate” vibe going when it comes to flavor combos. And now, Goldfish is getting into the game too this June, for a suggested retail price of $3.69.

However, and I cannot stress this enough, it would have been much funnier to call them Sea Cucumbers. I realize part of the whole thing is the fish shape, and they can’t break from tradition. But there was a real opportunity here to shake things up and have them in the shape of a sea cucumber, particularly as pickles are cucumbers.

I guess one thing working against this idea is that Sea Cucumbers are horrifying? They do look like pickles, albeit not green. But they’re slimy, and spiky, and generally unappealing. Versus a cute little smiling fish.

Okay, fine, I retract my note, Goldfish. Please proceed with these delicious looking little snacks.